13 janvier 2007

Sat. 13 Jan. - Dormir Dehors [Daran et les chaises]

Je l'ai pas fait exprès, mais il y a un semblant de transition vers ce qui je pense est mon premier article complètement détaché de mon vécu personnel:

J'ai été complètement abasourdi par cette nouvelle apparemment complètement anodine et présentée presque comme un fait divers:

«Des avions américains ont été bombarder un village dans le sud de la Somalie.»

En regard de ce qui se passe chaque jour en Iraq, il ne s'agit en effet probablement au plus que d'un fait divers militaire, comme tant d'autres qui sont passés sous silence chaque mois aux quatre coins du monde, mais ça fait tout de même le troisième pays dans lequel ils vont foutre la merde en autant d'années...
Donc, si mes souvenirs sont bons, la Somalie doit caracoler en tête du hit-parade des pays les plus pauvres du monde, famine, guerre civile, hygiène remarquable, maladies et consorts, c'est sûr que ces gens-là sont en passe de constituer une menace terroriste de portée mondiale (ils seraient pas en train de développer un programme de force de frappe nucléaire sur base spatiale derrière le dos de tout le monde, par hasard?). Les Etats-Unis y auraient-ils trouvé un adversaire à leur taille? Question de marquer quelques points pour balancer le merdier de l'autre côté par exemple...

Ah oui, mais c'est qu'il y avait trois grands chefs terroristes, en train de préparer leur prochaine attaque, planqués au milieu d'un troupeau de moutons, les fourbes! Alors on ratisse le village, on rôti les moutons, les bergers, les chiens et toute la zone et puis on publie un communiqué de presse victorieux comme quoi on a toutes les chances de croire que les 3 drôles en question sont au nombre de la centaine de victimes (sans compter les moutons)!

J'ai dû lire trop de romans d'espionage, ou voir trop de James Bond... Il sert pas à ça, lui? C'est pas le genre de gars qu'on envoie justement traquer les ben-laden et compagnie, et leur faire la peau discrètement, sans devoir faire dans le collatéral dégoûtant? Allez, même les Russes ont pigé ce concept et ils ont réussi à empoisonner proprement leur Litvinenko sans trop déborder [404-Brain not found, et là aussi], ni devoir pour autant recourir à nucléariser Londres, par exemple...

- Apparemment, les quelques 200.000 Somaliens qui habitent ici ne se sont pas réjouis du feu d'artifice... [The Globe & Mail] quel manque d'humour!
- Ah zut, tiens, ils ont raté leur coup: les trois drôles courent toujours! [Le Soir] Faudrait peut-être voir à atomiser toute la région, juste pour être sûr?

18 commentaires:

Anonyme a dit…

Salut, il faut que tu trouve un moment dans ton emploi du temps hyper chargé pour regarder "the constant gardiner", film sur magouille des firmes pharma en Afrique. Ce ne sont pas des raids aériens mais médicamenteux pas vraiment meilleurs…
Bizz

Anonyme a dit…
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